Potentially Bizarre Bazaar

What do I have in common with people who have so much money that they need a wealth manager to manage it, people who can afford very costly cosmetic products (beside the fact that I really can improve in the looks department) and finally the people who potentially drive a BMW convertible that costs more than my apartment.

Nothing, you loser. Pops a thought in your mind.

But the gurus of bazaar think otherwise or they wouldn't have planned a satellite advertisement campaign around the time I usually watch TV.

To be honest it felt good.

Whatever those brilliant minds contemplated while designing these campaigns for those forbiddingly priced products, it feels good to think that I have something in common with very exclusive demographics.   

Once upon a time when all those possibly rich people and I were watching a Jack Nicholson movie around midnight, at our respective homes, it occurred to me. What could possibly be the common factor between all these people and me.

Well, all of "US" potentially rich people like to watch Jack Nicholson movies for one. But is this enough to risk spending so much money on these campaigns? Millions of people like Jack (artistic license affords me the pleasure of being on first name basis with Mr. Nicholson), so do we. So what?

Then I really got carried away thinking about the lifestyles of the rich and richer.

Imagine CEO of a company waking up in the morning, browsing newspaper headlines, sipping morning tea while admiring the BMW (the convertible one) proudly parked beside the green grass of the lawn. Basically, a Bollywood movie kind of setting. Getting the picture?  

An assistant arrives with a folder containing appointments schedule. After carefully going through all the appointments, the CEO instructs to cancel some of them and asks the assistant to squeeze between appointments a business lunch with Minister Sahib at a super luxury hotel.

After taking a bath, the CEO applies those expensive cosmetics we talked about to make herself gorgeous (Aa Haa! Caught you imagining this CEO as male. You gender biased middle class miserable people).

So this gorgeous looking lady gets in her BMW and whisks off to her office. After the pleasantries are over, she calls in the wealth manager guys and gets on their case for making a few millions less during the last quarter.

As you can well imagine by my description of her day that how far off I am being in the know of things about CEO kind.

So, after that lunch we talked about a few words ago, she plans her evening that includes more richie-rich things (I'm tired).

Blah blah blah and its 11 PM when she heads back to her home that looks like a small, well, country.

She has had her dinner already at some fancy shmency party so she is not hungry while I am carefully choosing the flavor of my potato chips for consumption during the Jack Nicholson movie promised by good people of movie channel.

Could this be possible?

Has there been a mistake while choosing the time slot by these advertising people?

Or have they just figured it out by some crazy formulae that "I" am potentially a rich man to be.

Yeah, the crazy formulae thought feels good. (to be continued)

Facing the Book

It's becoming harder and harder in this Facebook era to avoid people in social life. Let's face it; all of us are stuck with some people in our friends lists that actually do not belong to the category.

There are acquaintances, friends of friends, first cousins, distant cousins (spouse side), irritating relatives/colleagues, old flames, cold flames and all the permutations and combinations imaginable under the sun. And believe you me it's not that easy to get rid of them.

And technology is not helping either. I am sure that all of you have already duly categorized your friends into different groups and you switch off some of the groups on chat while you chat with your "countable on your fingers friends". And those of you who have mastered this social giant to the extent possible must have assigned different privileges of looking at photographs, commenting on your status etc to different categories using your discretion.

In good old times post office took all the blame for all the lapses in communication. All the complaints about not keeping in touch or not writing regularly were redressed with "Oh I did not get your letters honey, these post office people, I tell you," or "I knew there was something wrong with your address," etc.

Comes the Facebook and you have nowhere to run or hide.

"Why didn't you like any of my comments,"

"Why didn't you accept my friend's friend request,"

and you are left with no option but to hit the like or accept button. And some months down the line you are wondering who the hell is this person sending me twenty Farm Ville requests on daily basis.

I am sure that many of you feel the need for proper buttons to express your real feelings such as
I Agree (Meaning: Okay. You are right but I do not wish to honor this with a comment)

I believe you (Meaning: Oh C'mon!!!)

How Cute (Meaning: Actually it isn't but I am glad I have to just click this button because writing that would be too big a lie for me)
Love You (Meaning: Use your discretion)
And then there are some indescribable emotions not fit for expressing through social media.

Lack of proper smiley signs also poses a challenge to already technically challenged people like myself. I for one would like to have a smiley for "fake smile :)" that resembles "real smile :)" which means that nobody would know you are faking a smile but it would let off some steam.

It's not that we wish to avoid everybody on Facebook. God knows there were some moments when you screamed with joy looking at the recent picture of that old "friend" who still looks so hot. After hesitantly sending the friend request you must have signed in many a times just hoping to see that romantic red sign that says 1 and frustrated upon the obnoxious pitch instead that tries to convince you about a free I Pod being given away every minute.

There is no denying either that this BOOK has made us smile, laugh and cry for all the good reasons. Has helped us find our long lost friends and also made us wish that some of them were lost long ago. It has given the reason to young and not so young to talk to that hot thing working at the cubicle opposite them in the office thank God.

So love it or hate it here it is. Keep signing in. :D